Chapter 20
My hands on the wall beside the door slid down slowly as I reclined back. I looked at everyone else, and the cluelessness showed on their faces.
I didn’t know how to take in that information. Really, I didn’t want to believe it. It had always been my dream to be the Luna of this pack – I had fantasized about it and spent my idle time speculating on how exactly the kingdom would be with me and Ty-
He walked out of the room he was in with Audrey and closed the door behind him. With his back against the wall, he shifted his gaze to me. I could see regret and self-denial in his eyes, as if he was trying to tell me something but he didn’t want anyone else to hear.
My father’s voice brought back my attention, “Oh, that’s splendid, Alpha. Em…when will the preparations begin?”
“As soon as my son proposes to the girl.”
“He hasn’t proposed yet?”
“No, but he’s told me he wishes to marry her and I have come to tell you so you can talk to the girl’s father.”
I turned to look back at Tyler and he did the same too. Why was I feeling hurt by hearing this conversation about this news?
“Okay, Alpha. It will be done.”
“Good, now… on to the main reason I came here. I heard… your warriors captured a werewolf hunter.”
My father paused then replied, “And who told you of this, Alpha?”
“My son.”
I was too annoyed and emotionally conflicted to look at Tyler one more time.
Rex’s words cut through the door like a sharp blade, “That hunter’s presence in the pack is a big threat to everyone else. Don’t you know the origin of those people?”
“Werewolf hunters?”
“Yes. They are scallywags and untamed savages. They say they kill threats to our kind but they are the threats themselves.”
How can something Adrian and I just made up to protect him have so much impact on the Alpha?
“I am aware of that, Alpha, and that’s why I have taken precautionary measures and subdued his powers.”
“And how did you do that?”
“I turned him into a Limean.”
The silence amplified my anticipation.
Rex finally broke it, “You turned him…into…. a Limean? Is that the solution to curtailing the fiery passions of your daughter and her involvement with that brute?”
My eyes widened. How did the Alpha know of that too?
“Alpha, I have cautioned my daughter and-”
“Well, it seems you haven’t cautioned her enough. Maybe it’s the loose character my son saw in her that made him rethink her being his mate…”
I felt insulted. Loose character? I had a loose character? What had Tyler been telling his father about me and the grove?
“I don’t believe I raised my daughter that way, Alpha.” My mom finally spoke.
“You know very well this grove is a pillar to the pack. Whatever happens here, affects what happens there. If you don’t ensure the smooth running of things here, the pack will be gravely affected.”
“I’m aware, Alpha.” My dad replied solemnly, too solemn for my liking.
“So, why have you been negligent? To allow an elder come back to me to complain of the utter disrespect he had to face in this grove? Such has never happened, until you decided to let a hoodlum into our home!”
The weight of his words hung heavily in the room. I glanced at Tyler, searching for a familiar gaze that could give me understanding, but all I saw was blankness.
It pained me to think that my actions had caused my father to be reprimanded in the ears of everyone.
Rex’s tirade continued, “I will lay emphasis on this and this alone. You need to be vigilant of your daughter, that man and your warriors. If anyone makes a slip up, and it gets to my ears, I’ll hold you accountable for it.”
The implications were clear – I was seen as a vulnerable liability that needed constant protection. Nothing else from that.
Their meeting concluded with a sense of tension hanging in the air, my father unable to say anything afterwards. What had started off on a pleasant note for them, ended with a sour reckoning.
Rex’s departure was as swift as his arrival. He had left us to process the weight of his words. Tyler and Audrey left with them and I barely brought myself to look at Tyler’s face after what his father had said. I couldn’t help but feel angry and frustrated.
The room emptied, everyone dispersed, and the silence that followed was suffocating. My father’s weary gaze met mine, and I could see the inner battle he was facing. He also made it clear to me I had embarrassed him when I tried to speak to him on his way to his room and he blatantly ignored me. It was clear that Rex’s visit had shaken him, forcing him to confront his own shortcomings as a father and leader.
I took a deep breath and made my way to my own room. One couldn’t process one news for another to come hitting in. Tyler and Audrey were getting married. I shouldn’t care but I did.
Then also, my father had grown more suspicious of Adrian. I didn’t even see him after the meeting, neither did I, Jax. It was one heap of concern over another and I wandered how I’d mentally and emotionally cope for what would come next.
••••••••••
I was struggling with my feelings for Adrian and the complicated relationship I had with Tyler. I needed someone to talk to, and Sarah, my closest friend, seemed like the right person. We had been through a lot together, and I trusted her.
One sunny afternoon, I found comfort under a big oak tree where Sarah and I often shared our secrets. She had come to visit that day and I told her about everything that happened lately, everything except I and Adrian’s secret.
“Shit’s been tough, babes. Geez, why didn’t you tell me about all this?”
“You had your own problems and duties to think of.” I sighed and rested my chin on my knees.
She rubbed my back, “Doesn’t mean you’d keep things from me, babes. My mom’s been having it tough cus of her sickness but it’s not been compared to what you’ve been through.” “Hey, but you’re daring…”
She smirked at me and I asked, “How?”
“You fucking made out with a stranger in the library, in front of your dad and an elder! That’s mad! You got more balls than me.”
I rolled my eyes at her, “I told you it wasn’t like that. It was a mess…”
“A mess that you loved every moment of…”
“Sarah, fuck off.”
We both giggled.
“But your dad shouldn’t have called you that. He still loves you, don’t mind it when he pretends to be harsh cus of Rex. When my dad was alive, he did that too anytime I made the smallest mistake.”
“I really felt bad…”
“Don’t go over your head for it. It’s done, it’s done. Life goes on.”
It was less stressful letting off steam with Sarah. She always knew the right words to say and I appreciated that.
There was another thing which really troubled my heart and I decided to tell her. I took a deep breath and started telling her about my confusion and inner conflict.
“Sarah, am I crazy?”
“When aren’t you ever?” She said sarcastically.
“No like, on a serious note… I feel torn.”
“Between…”
“Two guys.”
Sarah listened carefully and understood exactly what I was talking about without me explaining further. She knew I had strong feelings for both Adrian and Tyler. Adrian had a mysterious charm, and we had a special connection. Tyler, on the other hand, was my first love who betrayed and embarrassed me but I still felt a connection towards.
“It’s completely normal to feel that way, especially when it comes to matters of the heart. It really isn’t as complicated as you’re making it to be.” Sarah said.
“What do you mean by that?”
“The thing is, babes, you really need to use more head than heart in dealing with things of the heart, or else you’d just be depressed and miserable. Ask yourself what makes you attracted to both Adrian and Tyler, and then ask yourself what you want and what is important to you. If things align to one guy or to yourself, it’s still a win for you.”
I didn’t really understand what she meant so I asked, “You’d have to repeat that.”
“Look babes, it’s perfectly okay to follow your heart and make choices that would make you happy. Even if it goes against what others expect from you. You’d have to put you first.”
“So, in essence, I should be selfish?”
“Oh gosh, babes, why don’t you understand? Look, every decision and action you make have consequences so you have to consider those before making them. It’s important for you to be honest and have open conversations with both of them. Everyone involved needs to understand their roles and impact of their choices, but you should always put yourself first. Do you get me now?”
“Yeah, I think I’m starting to…”
She sighed and leaned on the tree.
Listening to Sarah’s wise words, I started to see things more clearly. I couldn’t ignore the feelings I had, but I also had a responsibility to handle the situation honestly and respect everyone’s emotions, not neglecting my own priorities.
Leaning against the tree, I thought about what to do next. The decisions I would make would not only affect my own happiness but also the dynamics within our group. It was a big responsibility, and I doubted I had the strength and support to face the challenges.
“Thanks for always being here when I need you.” We hugged.
“What are ride-or-dies for?”
I felt lighter, as if a weight had been lifted off my shoulders. Our conversation gave me the courage to confront my own feelings.
As the sun set, I decided to have honest conversations with both Adrian and Tyler. Not too soon, but I would. Even though it’d be hard facing Tyler, I just had to bring myself to do it. It was time to face the truth, express my feelings openly, and give them the chance to do the same.
I said goodbye to Sarah as she left the gate and headed back to our group’s area.
While I walked, I kept repeating an affirmation in my mind.
My happiness comes first.
•••••••••••
As time passed, the tension between Adrian, Tyler, and me grew worse. Adrian and I were still talking but his own personal conflicts hindered him from being more open with me
I had also noticed that Tyler’s visits became more frequent. He came with Audrey sometimes and came alone other times. He would barely glance at me and I didn’t want my reaction to the news about his marriage show in the way I looked at him. He hadn’t proposed to Audrey yet, his concerns were shifted to Adrian.Còntens bel0ngs to Nô(v)elDr/a/ma.Org
Jaxon told me once Tyler had found out about what happened in the library and how he told him he was angry about it. Why should he be angry about anything that I do?
Him and Adrian didn’t see eye to eye. It started with small looks and comments, but soon turned into outright bullying by Tyler.
The rest of the grove could feel the tension too, and it made everyone uncomfortable. Every interaction became a power struggle, with Tyler trying to prove himself dominant over Adrian.
I felt stuck in the middle, torn between two people. One I cared about and the other I seemed to still want. I wanted peace but it seemed impossible with the growing tension. I didn’t want to see the grove divided. In my heart, I knew we needed a resolution. I had to do something since I was the cause of it.
With a heavy heart, I finally decided it was time to talk to Adrian and Tyler separately. I needed to be honest with them about my feelings. Firstly, I needed to talk to Tyler.
I walked up to Tyler, with much inner struggle, and called him, “Tyler, I need to talk to you.”
He didn’t look at me. He continued staring at Audrey who was about leaving, which made me feel weird.
“Tyler, I said I need to talk to you.”
“And I heard you..” he said without looking at me.
“Can you at least look at me?”
“If I did, would you be able to say what you came to say?”
“What do you mean?”
“You came to threaten me to stay away from your Adrian, right? When I said you moved on too fast, you said I was being delusional. What about now?”
He had stood up and was staring at me, his teeth shut together.
“I didn’t come to threaten you. I came to talk to you, but it seems your insecurities haven’t gotten lesser since we last talked.” I didn’t want to say anything else from what I had practiced but Tyler always brought out the worst in me.
“My insecurities?” He laughed, “I’m the insecure one? If that’s true, then why have you been looking so down ever since you heard about I and Audrey’s wedding?”
What was he talking about? He’s not about to weaponize my emotions against me, “What are you talking about? Why would I care if you both are getting married?”
“I saw it in your eyes that day and I can still see it then now.” He spoke with so much confidence.
“See what?”
“That you still care…”
“You’re blind.”
“No, I’m right.”
“It was a huge mistake coming here…” I wanted to turn around to leave when he grabbed my hand and pulled me to his chest. My hands held his shoulder and he locked me into him. I didn’t realise we had been staring at each other for a while until he spoke, “You would actually choose him over me? That rascal? You want him?”
“Let go of me right now, Tyler.” My stomach turned.
“Tell me. Do you love him?” He pulled my waist unto his pelvis more and I wrestled to free myself from his hold.
“Let me go!”
“Tell me! Do you choose him over me?” His voice got sterner and his eyes had blackened… it was as if his wolf was awakening.
“Tyler, stop this! Let me go!”
Before I could think, he had already smashed his lips unto mine in the most aggressive way and I felt my body get hotter. He kissed me with all the anger and frustration he had bottled up then pulled away.
“Don’t you miss this? Do you want him more than you want me?” His voice broke but his eyes grew darker.
I was short of breath and on the brink of tears, “Please Tyler, just let me go…”
His snare got fouler and as he was about to hold the back of my neck, someone spoke with a powerful voice behind us, “Didn’t you hear her? She told you to let her go.”
We both turned back and saw Adrian standing there with his fists balled and his red eyes burning at Tyler.